The Self-Coaching Model: Results

This is the FIFTH post in a five-post series about The Self-Coaching Model.

The Self-Coaching Model has five components as listed below. In this post we discuss the RESULT line.

RESULT

Our result of any given circumstance is due to our thought, feeling and actions. And the result directly ties back to the thought we took action from.

Example 1:

Circumstance: My daughter repeated Level 9 this year.

Thought: She's behind.

Feeling: Worried.

Action: Watch all of workout. Lecture daughter. Complain to spouse. Ruminate on all of the ways my child is behind. Scour Instagram accounts of athletes she competed with at TOPs training.

Result: I reinforce the belief that she is behind and now I too am behind on my to-do list for the day.

Do you like how you are showing up? Do you like what you are experiencing? Do you like the result produced?

If not, good news. By tweaking thought-feeling-actions you can create change.

Circumstance: My daughter repeated Level 9.

Thought: There is much to learn in repeating a level.

Feeling: Hopeful.

Action: Notice and express interest in what my child is learning. Look for and discover additional ways to support my child with her goals. Stay calm when my daughter expresses frustration.

Result: I hold space for my daughter to learn and I learn a lot about myself, the sport and my daughter through the process.

Example 2:

Circumstance: My athlete broke her ankle.

Thought: If she would have focused on what I told her, this wouldn't have happened.

Feeling: Frustrated.

Action: Yell at athlete. Complain to co-workers. Lecture team. Notice more ways my athletes ignore me.

Result: I focus on problems, not solutions.

vs.

Circumstance: My athlete broke her ankle.

Thought: We'll get through this.

Feeling: Capable.

Action: Address the injury. Have compassion with myself and the feelings that surface for me and my athlete. I support my athlete in progressing while injured.

Results: I get through this.

Example 3:

Circumstance: My coach said, "your legs are bent".

Thought: I am bad at beam.

Feeling: Overwhelmed.

Action: Skip turns. Avoid eye contact with my coach. Collect evidence for other ways I am bad at beam.

Result: I reinforce my belief that I am bad at beam.

vs.

Circumstance: My coach said, "your legs are bent".

Thought: I wonder what else I can try to get my legs straight?

Feeling: Curiosity.

Action: Ask questions. Watch other athletes. Try different technique. Perform leg tightening drills at home.

Result: I gain information on how to get my legs straighter.

Example 4:

Circumstance: An 8.4 flashed on the scoreboard.

Thought: What a horrible score.

Feeling: Defeated.

Action: Cry. Pout. Notice all of the other horrible things in my life.

Result: I show up as a horrible version of myself.

vs.

Circumstance: An 8.4 flashed on the scoreboard.

Thought: I learned a lot today that will help me to score higher next time.

Feeling: Committed.

Action: Review the thoughts, feelings and actions that resulted in the 8.4 performance. Consider areas yet to improve upon. Express excitement to get back in the gym and work.

Result: I apply what I learned from my 8.4 routine.

Notice that all of these results belong to the thinker. Other people's results don't belong in our models. Not the judges, not our athletes, not our parents or coaches.

While we want to be aware of how we influence other people, our results should be just that; our own.

It's also important to note that the result line in the model is where our goals belong. Look forward to some killer goal-setting tools using the The Self-Coaching Model.

CONCLUSION

In future posts, we'll spend time evaluating models. We'll consider if our thoughts, feelings and actions are serving us or if they are instead moving us further from our desired short-term and long-term results.

We'll learn how to take action from genuine emotion. No white-knuckling. No pretending.

We'll also learn how to create emotion from believable thoughts. No thought stuffing with affirmations.

Most importantly we'll learn how to love who we are today and the process of becoming who we want to be in the future.

And we'll do ALL of this with purpose of showing our athletes how to do the same!

Check out The Three Step Process for Progress in the post below.